The colour of time.........

The winds of change stir. The landscape before me merges and meshes into shapes I cannot comprehend. I stand on the threshold of change. Am I ready for it?
Those familiarities with which I had become so accustomed to slowly fade away, leaving me, apprehensive, of what lies ahead.

We grow into our surroundings, the same way a lion does to his territory.
Having to move out of this comfort zone is positively catastrophic.

My life for the past 5 years had been amazing, wrapped within this cocoon of familiarity; now on the verge of stepping into my own, I realise all that I ever took for granted were my purpose of being.

Change is inevitable- very corny, very cliché but very much true. I have been in an introspective mood lately and happen to have come to a few conclusions. Fear not dear reader, I’m not going to get all preachy and up my own ass with philosophy and the like. But for arguments sake, if I do happen to wander down that path, you just hit the back button on your browser, fair enough ;)

I happen to have come home after a long time, and perhaps this is what set off the chain of reactions in the first place. Its funny how, what once was so familiar and normal can seem alien in just a span of few years. Blame it on the evolving skyscape or progressive landscape but home doesn’t seem to be that anymore. But was it just the changed architecture? Perhaps not, I dug deeper, within myself and realised it was me who’s changed. I was a totally different person back then, with perceptions and an outlook so different, that if by some freak of nature were time reversed and I come face to face with the older/younger??? (this is why I avoid messing with the tenses) me, I’d probably be a stranger to myself, and a pretty dumb one at that.

With that, I realise, the past few years of my life haven’t been a total waste after all. As a person I’ve grown, I’ve grown more understanding, grown more patient, grown intellectually and to top it all grown several feet too (I could actually pick on the older/younger me, he was quiet puny ;)

What’s more amazing then the change though is the process of metamorphosis. Of course when you migrate to a new place, new friends, new food, blah-blah-blah, you do realise and are very much aware of it but what about the new you?

That change, the inner-one, is so stealthily subtle you have no clue when, where or how it ever happened.
The times of fun and frolic seem numbered; seriousness has finally reared its ugly head in my life. I happen to be a self-proclaimed peter-pan so this whole growing up thing is rather painful, what I wouldn’t give to spray myself with a little bit of Tinkerbell’s magic powder and take off to Neverland right now. But I’m forced by dire needs to come out of the fantasy I live in, to confront the cold reality, it’s time I start thinking about the future (previously any such thoughts would have made me go straight to the shrink).

Perhaps for the first time in my life, I’m beginning to realise, not everything is a joke after all, but what bums me, is why shouldn’t it be? Why do we have to take life so seriously when it’s so much better the other way.

When I look back now, I see the trail I’ve left behind, from a confused, over-weight geeky bookworm to a lean carefree teen, the shades in my life were always constantly changing, perhaps for the first time I've been able to perceive this change. Is it because I’m growing up(shudders) or is it simply because I’ve obtained the wisdom enough to understand life(sniggers). Either way I still have a little time before I fall into this abyss of progression, and will hold on tightly to the child inside me and hope I don’t lose him in this plunge into the unknown.

Speaking of unknown, I’m supposed to be working on some assignment(i've no clue as to what's the topic) for my next sem *sighs* some things never change......